Relationships Start With You

The foundation of all great relationships in your life starts with the same main ingredient. You.

This might seem twisted to think about. We typically think of relationships as a 50/50 share. Which is true. But if you don’t focus 100% on yourself, you can’t give 50%. That’s some Rocky Math for you. What I’m trying to say is, when we work on being our healthiest self, that’s when our relationships become healthier.

I realize I have a little bit of a different approach when it comes to maintaining meaningful relationships. Saying “relationships start with you” can sound kind of backward. Whether it's coworkers, family, or with a partner, there is always a common denominator, you. In order to have a successful relationship, you need to be a successful you. Let me say the most important part again: when we become a healthier version of ourselves, our relationships get better. Putting in the work on yourself, to become a better you, is good work and hard work.

Can you imagine if this blog post just ended right there? “Hey, this is hard work. The end.” But that’s kinds of all I have to say. Or suggest, rather. Just imagine it for a second. What if, when it comes to building relationships that are deep, impactful, and meaningful, we shifted our perspective from only focusing on our 50% to focusing on our 100%. What if, for example, you focused on uncovering doubt in your life, re-writing the stories you tell yourself, or sitting in what makes you uncomfortable instead of ignoring it. How would that change your relationships?

What would it look like if you did these things instead of only focusing on doing “your part” in a relationship? Would you stop measuring the other person’s 50%? Would you have more clarity on your 100%?

Let this be your reminder, or encouragement, or push to stop ignoring working on yourself.